39 weeks until Christmas, friends! Did you hear me? 39 weeks!!!!
So, my elf reporterette job took me to the Research and Development Department. The head elf over there, Elf Quinton, wouldn’t give me the time of day. And you should never ever do that to a reporter.
You see, I heard those guys were building sleighs over there. They have so far this year fought over new sleigh designs and even got Santa involved in the design talks and stuff.
Santa approved their plans and they started work on what they call a prototype.
That’s a fancy way of saying the are building a sleigh that will never leave the barn. Ever. It’s just to look at.
But I got to talking to some of the junior elves over there and they don’t feel good about Santa’s sleigh so far this year.
My editor told me not to get too excited about that news. Nobody, he says, even thinks about Santa’s sleigh in March.
But I got to thinking. All the reindeer have left the North Pole and I mean all of them. The young ‘uns, like my baby Trixie, are at reindeer survival camp. The old ones, like Donner, are on vacation in places like South America. And the ones who are somewhere in the middle of age are all traveling back home or already there. They just are not here at the North Pole.
So what are these crazy elves in the R&D department worried about? They themselves say that sleigh will never fly. Well, of course not! There are no reindeer here to pull it.
So, with my reporter nose for news leading me, I asked them about all this goofy stuff. They just stared at me.
You see, they don’t understand that I understand what they are up to. They are building that weird looking sleigh just so they can build the sleigh they really want a few weeks from now.
You see, this so-called prototype is kind of a game they play with Santa. They work for months sketching it all out on paper and it’s something everyone compromises on. Then they build it.
But they know Santa is not going to like it so they just don’t do a very good job – and they build this monster right as the reindeer are leaving the North Pole. This whole process is a joke.
I saw this new sleigh and it’s awful. Everyone I know who has seen it hates it. And a lot of elves have seen it. Well, except for the Big Elf, the one who matters – Santa!
He’s supposed to get a look at it next week. He will come in, say “Hmmmm….” and then order this and that and everything in between to be changed.
Then they will build another one.
This process repeats itself over and over until Santa says “Hmm….I wonder how she flies?”
Then, and only then, do we start to see reindeer again at the North Pole.
It’s a crazy process getting Santa’s sleigh right every year. And it is a big story. I aim to tell it to you….but not till the Santa Tracker Herald Star is published over at SantaTrackers.net.
A lot could happen between now and then.