What Happens on Santa’s Flight
Elf Crash Murphy was our first guest of the New Year in North Pole Chat. His purpose in this discussion was to talk about things that happened during Santa’s flight this past Christmas. Here is a transcript of that conversation:
| Crash Murphy | Hi everyone! |
| Elf Ernest | Hello Elf Crash! |
| Lil Cream | Hey! |
| Elf Ernest | Welcome to our first chat of the new year |
| Crash Murphy | Excited to be here! |
| Elf Ulan | Hi Elf Crash! |
| Elf Ulan | Me too! |
| Crash Murphy | Hi Lil Cream! Hi Ulan! Happy new year to you! |
| Lil Cream | You too Crash! |
| Elf Ernest | Are you ready for the new year, Crash? |
| Crash Murphy | You betcha! |
| Elf Ulan | Happy new year too ! |
| Elf Ernest | Crash we’re expecting a small crowd today. But we’ve billed this chat as a recap of flying with Santa last month. We’re hoping to get some inside stories about his flight. |
| Crash Murphy | Ok….I can do that, I suppose |
| Elf Ernest | I understand you and Frank spent some time in the studio today for a new podcast about kind of the same thing |
| Crash Murphy | Yes, he did something cool. He played some clips from the radio program – some things I had not heard. It was a good time! |
| Lil Cream | That’s cool! |
| Elf Ernest | That sounds awesome. Do you know when that podcast will be ready? |
| Elf Ulan | Yeah! |
| Crash Murphy | Some time in the next day or two, maybe Monday. Not really sure. It was a long one. |
| Elf Ernest | Oh good! |
| Elf Ernest | Were there a lot of clips you had NOT heard? |
| Crash Murphy | Yes, quite a few. A lot of folks don’t realize that there’s a lot going on up there. I have Kringle Radio in one ear, North Pole Flight Command in the other and Santa…kind of whenever he wants to tell me something in between. |
| Elf Ernest | Well, I think that is the kind of insight people want to know about, Crash. Just how you do what you do. |
| Crash Murphy | Well, I don’t do anything special but I have a great seat for it all. I’m happy to talk about it. Glad to be doing it, actually. |
| Elf Ernest | It sounds like you don’t have enough ears for all that flies around on the radio up there! |
| Crash Murphy | Yeah, it’s a very active environment. Frank and I talked about that on the podcast, Ernest. |
| Elf Ernest | You’re up there a long time, too. Don’t you get tired? |
| Crash Murphy | Honestly I don’t get to feeling tired until we’re just about done. There’s no time to really think about it. It’s go go go from the minute Santa launches and it takes my full attention. |
| Elf Ernest | We’re told that Santa set another record this year but he still came in at over 30 hours. That’s a real long time to be in a sleigh. |
| Crash Murphy | Yes and Santa still really wants to break that 30-hour barrier. He wants it something fierce. |
| Elf Ernest | Do you think he can do it? |
| Crash Murphy | Yes, it’s just a matter of time. A billion different variables have to swing his way but he’s darn close to it now. |
| Elf Ernest | Do you have a hard time keeping up with Santa? |
| Crash Murphy | Sometimes. |
| Crash Murphy | But I don’t pilot my own sleigh, Ernest. I have Elf Vernon, who is one of our best test pilots, and he pilots my sleigh. There’s no way I could fly it, keep up with Santa and do all the other stuff I do at the same time. |
| Elf Ernest | I see. Does Santa give you things to do up there too? |
| Crash Murphy | Yeah, Frank asked me that too. Did you guys talk? |
| Elf Ernest | Hahaha – no, no. |
| Crash Murphy | I do little things here and there. Mostly errands, that kind of thing. |
| Elf Ernest | Doesn’t Santa have other elves for that? |
| Lil Cream | What type of errands? |
| Crash Murphy | He does. You wouldn’t believe the number of sleighs up there supporting Santa. But occasionally he’ll ask me to do something for him, usually late in the flight when he knows I’m bored. |
| Crash Murphy | Errands? Mostly getting little things he needs for someone or that he forgot about. A lot of food errands for food gifts. He does that because knows when I’m hungry |
| Elf Ernest | What do all those sleighs do? |
| Crash Murphy | They are there for various purposes. Re-supply of the sleigh is the biggest job up there. But there are sleighs there for emergency situations – safety reasons. |
| Elf Ernest | Are there sleighs up there for “just-in-case” that never actually do anything? |
| Crash Murphy | Oooohhhhh, yes. The ambulance sleigh goes every year and so far I’ve never seen it used but once. |
| Elf Ernest | You mean…Santa got INJURED? |
| Crash Murphy | No, not at all. That’s not happened. |
| Crash Murphy | Once, we were over Mexico City, and we saw an accident happen on a highway below us. |
| Elf Ulan | Does it during a fling? |
| Elf Ernest | Oh my |
| Crash Murphy | Yeah, it looked worse than it turned out to be. A car flipped over and Santa immediately dispatched the ambulance sleigh. But everyone was okay and when the regular ambulance got there our sleigh guys got out of there fast. It could have been worse |
| Elf Ernest | Wow….how long ago was that? |
| Crash Murphy | Golly….five or six years ago. |
| Elf Ernest | I don’t remember that being on the news. |
| Elf Crusader | Sorry I’m late |
| Crash Murphy | That never made the news, Ernest. If I recall Santa didn’t want it on the news. |
| Elf Ernest | Is there a lot of stuff that doesn’t make the news? |
| Elf Ernest | Hi Elf Crusader |
| Elf Crusader | Hello ernest and hello crash |
| Crash Murphy | Certainly. Routine stuff mostly. Stuff that isn’t interesting for the most part. |
| Crash Murphy | Hey Crusader, how you feeling, friend? |
| Elf Ulan | Hi Elf Crusader! |
| Lil Cream | hey! |
| Crash Murphy | I heard you were under the weather |
| Elf Crusader | Yes, I was. Was not fun at all |
| Elf Ernest | Really? Crusader has the flu or something? |
| Crash Murphy | Are you doing better? |
| Elf Crusader | I am! Much better! |
| Elf Crusader | I had covid |
| Elf Ernest | Glad to hear that. We’re talking to Crash about flying with Santa. |
| Elf Ernest | Covid – yow!!! |
| Crash Murphy | Oh that sucks |
| Crash Murphy | You know, I haven’t had it yet. |
| Elf Crusader | Oh! No problem! I’ve got plenty of questions |
| Elf Ulan | Glad you feel better now |
| Lil Cream | I had it exactly a year ago today im pretty sure |
| Elf Ernest | Fire away with the questions, Crusader. You too Lil Cream and Ulan! |
| Elf Crusader | Be glad you haven’t had it. It isn’t fun |
| Crash Murphy | I know too many that have had it. I’m drinking my eggnog. Not gettin’ it. |
| Elf Ernest | Crash, what would happen if Santa got sick for Christmas Eve? |
| Elf Crusader | Ok. Crash, what’s it like up there in the sky? Don’t you get cold? |
| Crash Murphy | I really don’t know. He NEVER gets sick. I don’t know how he does it |
| Elf Ulan | When did you know Santa chose the last sleigh? Elf Crash? |
| Crash Murphy | Yeah, it can get cold at times. I dress in layers and I’m taking things off and putting them all the time. Especially when we start the whole north-south rotation. It’s kinda psycho |
| Crash Murphy | Oh Ulan – that sleigh thing was WILD. I reported on it so I likely knew before anyone else. |
| Elf Crusader | What about the weather up here in Minnesota. It changes a lot , especially in winter |
| Crash Murphy | I wasn’t surprised though. I knew that sleigh last year was never going to fly. I realized it in mid-December |
| Elf Crusader | Why did santa do it? |
| Crash Murphy | My recollection of Christmas Eve in Minnesota this year was that there was snow, but man, was it cold there. |
| Elf Crusader | Always is. Was about 20 something here that night |
| Elf Ulan | Wow, you already knew then. Was the sleigh in the museum? |
| Crash Murphy | Why did Santa do the sleigh thing? Lots of speculation about that. I honestly do think he was testing the sleigh boys a bit. And Flight Command. But part of me says he really want to fly that old sleigh anyway. |
| Crash Murphy | Actually that sleigh wasn’t in the museum, it was in Santa’s barn. He had it because he left it there after flying it to Canada in October. |
| Elf Crusader | Crash, what if you have to, you know, relieve yourself? |
| Crash Murphy | He surprised everyone by taking that sleigh and not the sleigh he used in 2021 |
| Crash Murphy | Hahaha – Good question, Crusader and I get it alot. |
| Elf Crusader | Really? So what’s the answer? |
| Lil Cream | Hey guys! I gotta head out, it was nice chatting with you all! Hopefully I’ll see you all soon once the site stuff gets fixed |
| Crash Murphy | I’ll land somewhere usually to find the little elf’s room. But in case of emergency I have a special little elf…uh, porta potty on the sleigh. |
| Crash Murphy | Bye Lil Cream |
| Elf Crusader | Oh? I never knew that! |
| Elf Ernest | I’ll pass it along Lil Cream |
| Lil Cream | Bye see ya! Thanks again! |
| Elf Ernest | Crash…trying to be delicate here….is it an actually walk in porta potty or more like an emergency container of some type. |
| Crash Murphy | Well, I’ll just say it’s NOT a walk-in anything, okay? |
| Elf Ulan | Bye Elf Lil Cream! |
| Elf Ernest | Hahaha |
| Elf Crusader | Oh man! I opened a can of worms |
| Elf Ernest | The rigors of sleigh flight, I guess |
| Crash Murphy | It’s okay, Crusader. Natural question. |
| Elf Ernest | Well, 30+ hours of flight means the issue has to come up once or twice |
| Elf Crusader | Crash, I heard of a funny story of one Christmas Eve where you got hungry and stopped for a meal |
| Crash Murphy | It’s an easy thing for me. Not-so-easy for Santa |
| Elf Ulan | Did the Flight Command elves understand now why Santa operated the test flights last year? |
| Crash Murphy | I did? Was that this year? |
| Elf Crusader | No. It was a few years ago. Elf moe mentioned it lol |
| Crash Murphy | Elf Ulan – I think they all understand in Flight Command now. They think Santa is a little sneaky. |
| Crash Murphy | Yeah…I’ve been known to look for cheeseburgers on Christmas Eve. |
| Elf Crusader | Don’t you ever worry about being seen crash? |
| Elf Crusader | Why? Don’t you eat crash? |
| Crash Murphy | Not at all. Why would I worry about being seen? |
| Elf Ulan | Hahaha, okay! That’s good! |
| Crash Murphy | Of course I eat. I love to eat. But 30 hours is a long time to live on twinkies alone, you know? |
| Elf Crusader | Because some people would laugh at an elf or not believe |
| Elf Crusader | TRUE |
| Crash Murphy | I don’t have time for that kind of worry, Crusader. If someone sees me, they see me. |
| Elf Crusader | You can’t expect to live on sugar crash! You could get ummmmm fat |
| Crash Murphy | I’m 155 pounds on my heaviest day, Crusader. I live nearly exclusively on sugar. |
| Elf Ernest | We get that same kind of question about Santa, especially after he eats all those cookies. |
| Elf Crusader | Wow! That’s an incredible feat! How come humans get fat then? |
| Crash Murphy | Ernest, I know you know this but Santa is ripped. |
| Elf Crusader | He is? Is he built like the undertaker from wwe? |
| Crash Murphy | Well, I am human, Elf Crusader. I don’t know why I don’t get fat. |
| Elf Ulan | Did you bring pies a lot too? |
| Crash Murphy | Pies don’t travel well, Ulan., But I would if I could. |
| Elf Crusader | I mean, santa probably looks like the rock or hulk hogan |
| Crash Murphy | I don’t know who Undertaker is, Crusader. But Santa has a really low BMI, that’s all I can tell you. |
| Elf Ulan | I think you are active! |
| Elf Ernest | Wow, the time has really flown – last questions for Crash? |
| Crash Murphy | Yes, I am active, maybe more than your average elf. |
| Elf Crusader | Is there any updates on my podcast? |
| Crash Murphy | Good golly, Crusader. I forgot to ask Frank that today. I will though. |
| Elf Crusader | If not, no biggie |
| Crash Murphy | We should have had you on the podcast we recorded today. You have good questions. |
| Elf Ulan | I’m appreciate it if you suggest to me a job or a role this year |
| Elf Ernest | When is that coming out again? |
| Elf Crusader | Thanks crash! Btw, we need to do another podcast sometime. This time, you be in the interview chair |
| Crash Murphy | Tomorrow or Monday |
| Crash Murphy | Or Tuesday |
| Crash Murphy | That’s a good idea Crusader! |
| Elf Crusader | I would love to be a part of it someday soon |
| Crash Murphy | Elf Ulan…I don’t know when the new job thing rolls out. But you’d have my endorsement for anything you want to do. |
| Elf Ernest | Ok, everyone. Thanks for being here today. |
| Elf Crusader | I’m still sector lead right? |
| Elf Ernest | Crash, thank you for all the great information. We look forward to that new podcast! |
| Crash Murphy | Until they say otherwise, Crusader, yes. |
| Elf Ernest | Bye everyone! |
| Crash Murphy | Thanks everybody! |
| Elf Ulan | Thank you, Elf Ernest, and Elf Crash! |
Thank you, Elf Ernest for updating us immediately! Thank you, Elf Crash; it was fun and passed so fast. I wanted to ask more, but I’m happy to learn a lot. I didn’t know Elf Vernon is your pilot. I wish Santa could fly around the world safer and more fun this year! I’m looking forward to listening to both podcasts! XD