Santa Takes Charge of Operation Merry Christmas

After yesterday’s long rest Santa awoke early this morning and immediately called a meeting of Santa’s Council. Santa’s Council are all the department heads at the North Pole. They meet often but this was not a scheduled meeting. I was in the meeting and Santa was very serious. He asked everyone for a status update. There were a few surprises.

“We are far behind,” Elf Bernard, head of Santa’s workshop said. “The Bah Humbug virus has set us back at least two weeks.” That bit of news was shocking for everyone to hear. I thought the Workshop might be behind by just a couple of days. But two weeks behind with two weeks to go is really, really bad news. “How could this happen?” Santa asked. Elf Bernard did not mince words.

“Look,” Bernard said. “It takes basically four steps to make a Mr. Potato Head. We have to mold the pieces, paint on the details, assemble and then package it all up. None of those things are particularly hard. But when your best molders all go down to sickness the painters and the packagers have nothing to do when the molded pieces run out. So I take those guys and I put them on the line making video games. A video game elf is highly skilled, just as a Mr. Potato Head elf is highly skilled. But they are skilled in different ways. And with the Potato Head line shut down I back up there and then I back up in video games because the Potato Head guys don’t know what they are doing there. It is a mess.”

The meeting got pretty quiet after that as Santa talked about the problems in each department. The problems in the Workshop backs up things in the Wrapping Department. The Wrapping Department problems slows down things in sleigh packing. And it all gets back to the Bah Humbug Virus and when it can be controlled.

“Well,” Elf Dr. Lionel P. Spock told Santa, “We’re doing all we can. We think we have it contained. The worst of it appears to have hit the Workshop, the medical center staff and the guys in Public Relations. We’re trying to keep it out of Santa’s Stables at all costs. We keep the kitchen elves completely to them selves. The Weather Center guys are hanging in there, the elves in Research and Development seem alright, too. It could be a lot worse Santa.”

Elf Victor confirmed that the reindeer are healthy and will be wrapping up the Reindeer Games this week. All other departments gave positive results.

At the end of the meeting Santa was smiling. “I think we can handle this,” Santa told us. He ordered elves he has working at the South Pole, in Europe and in South America to transfer to the North Pole later this week. Elf Quinton will work with Elf Victor as soon as the Reindeer Games are over to fly them up here. That may cause some of you out there in the world to maybe see a lot of sleighs in the skies this week, depending on where you live and what the weather conditions are like. Santa even said to fly them up during the day time if necessary. But he wants more elves in the workshop by Friday.

Mrs. Claus got very excited when she heard this news. She loves all of Santa’s elves, especially those who don’t work at the North Pole. She left the meeting right away to begin planning on where to help all these elves find a place to sleep and, of course, what to feed them when they arrive.

The only one not happy with this news was Elf Agent X. After the meeting I saw him talking to Santa in a whisper and he appeared really, really concerned.

— Elf Ernest

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