Years ago I got in a lot of trouble for writing a column titled A Fat Man’s Holiday.
That article talked about Santa’s love of food and the North Pole celebration of Thanksgiving.
I will attempt to once again explain it all without getting anyone upset.
First of all, let’s talk about Santa and food.
You know all this about Santa. Don’t get mad at me for calling Santa “the Big Guy” or mentioning how much he eats. You all feed him cookies. You have a part to play in this.
Just because I call it a “fat man’s holiday” does not mean I’m calling Santa a fatso. I’m just not.
He’s not a porker, a budda-belly, a beached whale, a laardvark, a tubby, Fatty McFat, salad dodger, buffet killer, butter master, a bag of doughnuts, gordo, Count Fatula, lard gargler, cake magnet, wifi blocker, carbzilla, a fattleship, blimp, fatty, hogbeast, lardo, podger, ground sloth, hambeast, Slenderella, or plump or portly or rotund.
It’s a fat man’s holiday because it is a time of feasting. That is all. And food is not the only thing Santa feasts on at Thanksgiving.
Like everyone else at the North Pole he loves the day off. He loves being with family and friends. He loves putting up the Christmas tree. He loves playing games. He loves making things in the kitchen. He loves pie. He loves being prayerful. He loves telling everyone what he is grateful for. He loves looking at the lights, starting on his Christmas cards, watching football and movies, and he loves getting ready for Christmas.
Thanksgiving at the North Pole is a huge celebration. Some even think it is bigger than Christmas.
There is truth to that. By the time Christmas comes around some of us are so tired we sorta sleep through some of it. We love Christmas. But for an elf Christmas is an end. Thanksgiving is a vibrant beginning.
I guess you could say that Thanksgiving for those of us at the North Pole is our Christmas.
There’s nothing wrong with that.
And there is nothing wrong with you having a big Thanksgiving too.
I hope you enjoy it.