Santa Returns After Ending Mysterious Sleigh Flights

Santa and Mrs. Claus returned to the North Pole today, abruptly ending their mysterious sleigh flight “experiment” that started last month.

“It’s July in just a few days and it’s time for us to come back to the North Pole,” Santa explained to a hastily gathered North Pole press corp.

It was announced that Team Pink – the team piloted by Mrs. Claus – was victorious in their competition against Santa’s Team Red by a mere 1.47 points. The competition was closely followed by North Pole elves because Team Pink featured all girl reindeer against the boy reindeer of Santa’s team.

“It was never a competition,” Santa explained again. “It was an experiment. We wanted not only to test some experimental design ideas but we wanted to test some theories about sleigh flight relative to reindeer gender. And we learned a lot. We learned that in the colder thinner air of the North Pole the girls were able to gain an edge due to their speed, agility and flexibility but that those abilities were more taxed in the humid climates near the equator. The girls won up here and the boys triumphed down there. But really what those tests showed was that in order to have a truly efficient team of reindeer you need a mix of those natural abilities on both sides. None is better than the other, they’re both effective. But when mixed together in a balanced way that’s when we approach maximum performance as a team.”

Mrs. Claus expressed gratitude to all the reindeer, sleigh designers and flight consultants who helped Team Pink. She explained that last week Santa wanted to once again mix the teams and Team Pink was anchored for a few days by Donner and Blitzen. “Getting those boys to put on the colors of Team Pink took some work,” Mrs. Claus giggled. “But they took it all in good humor.”

When asked if these strange sleighs would influence this year’s sleigh for Christmas Eve Santa was again very direct in pointing out that the sleighs used in the Team Red vs. Team Pink competition were never thought of or designed for actual use at Christmas.

“These sleighs were fun to design, fun to build,” Santa said. “But they were more of something I did in my garage. They weren’t the work of Flight Command and the guys over are Research and Development. They were there, they added a lot to the whole thing. But for this year’s sleigh we’re building it on last year’s record setting design, not on this stuff.”

Santa indicated that North Pole Flight Command would have some announcements to make after the chat scheduled with Tracker Elves later today at SantaTrackers.net.

Santa did not say whether he or Mrs. Claus would be in on that chat.