Breaking News! Alarms of a different sort are going off at the North Pole and everyone here is in shock. These are special alarms. They only go off once a year and only for a special reason: they announce that elves need to gather to watch Santa launch. Everyone here is confused. But the news […]
Breaking news! Twelve hours from now Santa launches. Just 12 hours left!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Things here at the North Pole are very, very busy. The workshop is going a billion miles per hour, trying their best to get everything done. I understand they are still really, really behind. But the Tracking Center is all ready to go […]
The sun is rising in the South Pacific and the island nations of the sea are awaking now to Christmas Eve morning. For elves working that part of the world it is a busy time. They will be testing their tracking equipment over the next couple of hours as well as ensuring their communication systems […]
Santa’s sleigh just returned to the North Pole. I saw it land just moments ago. It appears the sleigh is undamaged and that Elf Vernon and those with him on the flight are unhurt. Elves from the Research and Development Department are all over the sleigh at this moment, making sure all parts are there […]
Big holy-moly breaking news again! Santa is launching a navy. Yes – a navy, as in boats. Three large ships have just departed from ports in Dubai, Singapore and Rotterdam. We don’t know yet where they are going or what their mission is. We don’t know how big they are. We have reporters working on […]
Breaking News! Evidently the Iranians are serious about getting Santa’s sleigh out of Iran. They have just fired a missile of some sort at it. Elves in the Tracking Center assure me that the sleigh is in no danger. Elf Vernon is not only moving at blazing speed he has also flown to an altitude […]
More breaking news! Alarm bells are now going off in MY department. We just received an official notice of complaint from the government of Iran in Tehran. They are demanding that Santa Claus order the sleigh out of Iranian airspace immediately. Honestly – they didn’t have to ask. Elf Vernon has already turned the sleigh […]
Breaking News! Alarms are going off in the Tracking Center and lots of radio activity can be heard there. Evidently Santa’s sleigh is on a test flight and they are now over the skies of Iran. Since entering Iranian airspace the alarms at the tracking center have been going off. We will try to find […]
An interesting note was just sent from Elf Agent X in the tracking center. Santa doesn’t take flight for at least another 14 hours or so but already Elf Agent X is asking for more secret spies for Santa. This time, he needs them in Canada. A secret spy is an elf, so you’ll have […]
Elf Victor just told me that Santa’s A-Team of reindeer – Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph have all safely arrived back to the North Pole. They are now being sent to a special barn, located a little distance away from the main reindeer barn. The reindeer will eat a good […]
Elves in the tracking center tell us that hundreds of spotters are beginning to check in from the land of China. China is a massive country and many mistakenly believe that Santa is not known or popular there. On the contrary, Santa is very popular in China. The biggest concern for Santa in China is […]
He did it! Elf Vernon, test piloting Santa’s sleigh, did indeed set an all time speed record for Santa’s sleigh while over the Atlantic ocean a short time ago. Elf Quinton watched it on the sleigh cam in the tracking center, where elves following him sent up a cheer when the record fell. The final […]
